So, what’s a widow’s blog and what do bloggers do?
I get the question often, from friends, family, and followers. Blogging isn’t as new as you may think; it’s been around since the late 1990s and like most things internet, has been picking up speed ever since. Blog stands for “website log”, like a journal. The word can also be used as a verb, as in, “I’m blogging today”.
Blog defined by Wikipedia means “a regularly updated website or web page, typically run by one person or a small group that is written in an informal, conversational style. As a verb, to add new material to or regularly update a blog.”
Blogs can exist on a website, in an online news source, or even on Facebook or Pinterest. I like to think of it as much like a newspaper column or a magazine. Columnists regularly wrote articles for a newspaper, picking different topics to talk about in different columns. Just as newspaper columnists tend to have a special area of interest or expertise. It’s no different with bloggers. It’s even true for the subsets of “widow bloggers”.
And just like columnists, we are paid for our time and efforts via ads in our “paper” or blog. For many of us, for me, it’s a full-time job of many hours work.
I like to tackle some of the things nobody talks about much. What helps, of course, but what hurts when it catches us by surprise. Anybody else get choked up the first few times they went grocery shopping? Me too! Could barely remember your name for a while? Memory struggles are common for a while. Nobody told you that either, I’ll bet.
I do get angry, though, when I hear some of the stories from widows about the ridiculous bureaucracy problems, the cruelness of family members and the social shunning so many of us encounter. I certainly did. I’m sure that all of us thought we would get some special consideration and tenderness in our time of grief. Sadly, that’s often not what happens. Sadly, most often, the offenders are offending because they know no better. Let’s say…. they are pretty clueless. My recent books, with Lynda Cheldelin Fell, (Grief Diaries: Loss of a Spouse and Grief Diaries: How to Help the Newly Bereaved, available on this website in the “Healing Reads” section of this site, address in detail the missteps that well-meaning sympathizers make.
By talking about them, shedding light on them, I hope to educate, enlighten and change our culture for the better, when it comes to how we treat our widows and widowers. It is Biblical, after all, that we are treated well. By talking about them, I hope to bring grief out of the closet. It helps a lot to know that we aren’t the only one. Grief is more taboo than sex….and isn’t that just ridiculous?
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